Tag Archives: Worthiness
Do you ever feel like money takes the luster out of life?
Money is something people really don’t like to talk about, but we all want money.
We have to get to a point where we get comfortable talking about it and figure out
how we can deal with it and not let it suck the life out of us.
When you’re stressed about money, it shows on your face, it shows up in the
conversations that you have.
Don’t give all of your good energy to stressing over money.
There are things that you can do to alleviate a lot of that stress, like prepare, take
the time to figure out how much money you can set aside every month to use as backup.
Do you ever feel like it’s too late for you to care about your body?
It’s a really serious question and you don’t have to think about that
only at the beginning of the new year.
Knowing how to dress and what style would look good on you is
important, but, things that are deep down inside within us is more
What’s important is that you care about what’s in your heart and in
your mind, that guides everything that we do.
How do you want to feel everyday when you wake up?
Decide right now how you want to feel everyday, because you’re
worth it – you have value.
The gifts that you have and the gifts that we’ve been give by God, a gift is something that
has been given to to us and it comes really naturally and easily. We all have gifts and they
are meant to bless the lives of other people as well as our own.
We need to think about our gifts all the time so that we can grow it and expand it, which
allows us to share it with other people.
Sharing your gifts with other people will bring a smile to them and yourself.
Gifts comes in all sizes and shapes, it’s so diverse, there’s no two gifts alike-it’s endless.
Share your gifts today!
1. You can look at yourself in the mirror and smile with excitement for the day.
2. Know what you’re really capable of doing.
3. Have the ability to say YES or NO when you want to.
4. Make better decisions on a daily basis.
5. Make better financial decisions.
6. Feel good in your clothes no matter what size you are.
7. Feel confident when you meet other people.
8. Recognize (with honesty) everything that’s going on in your life.
9. Recognize and receive opportunities when they come your way.
10. Experience and feel joy every day!
Have you ever felt like there are some things that you’re struggling with
and that you’ll never overcome them? I know I have!
There seems to be a problem that’s common among many of the women that I talk with
in my community, women that I teach and women that I do business with… and, it’s low
self-worth. Have you ever thought about that?
With all of the things that get in our way, low self-worth is the one (thing) that is not so
recognizable. Now why is that? I’d like to share with you what I know and what I’ve
Low self-worth affects everything you do.
It’s really running your life without you even realizing that it’s happening.
Low self-worth has symptoms like a low grade fever – it’s there, but not that noticeable
or recognizable, so you still go about your daily life trying to get things done. You feel
like there’s a conflict that’s going on inside of you.
You start to wonder and even question yourself about what could be happening. Could
there be a problem with me? Do you dare to even wonder about something like that, is
it even possible?
You think to yourself ‘someone please tell me what’s going on!’… When is this (frustration)
going to stop? (that’s what I’ve said to myself). Aren’t things supposed to get easier as
life and time goes on, and, as your skills and knowledge about yourself and life grow?
You are made up of many, many layers as a human being – some of the main ones are
the mental, emotional, spiritual and physical layers that are inseparably a part of you.
Therefore, there are triggers that make some of those layers start shaking, and, you
have no idea what’s going on! It happens week after week, month after month and
you start to get really frustrated with yourself and your life.
Triggers come from many sources that you probably have never even thought of.
Take a look at some of the sources that are listed below that affect your self-worth.
Sources of Low Self-Worth:
- Your role in your family growing up
- How you were treated and that same treatment was transferred down
- If you were abused
- What people have told you
- Cultural experiences
- Modeled by other people in your family
- Stories you tell yourself
- Your role in social groups
Things People Have Said To You:
- Don’t be big head
- Who do you think you are
- Don’t show off
- Why can’t you be like your brother/sister
- You’re stupid
- Don’t be an idiot
- You’re not smart enough
- Keep your mouth shut and stop asking so many questions
Signs & Symptoms of Low Self-Worth:
- Need validation
- Put on a facade
- Admire other peoples gifts and not your own
- Refuse to set goals because you know you won’t reach it
- Always trying to please people
- Tired all the time
- No motivation
- You don’t start things or don’t take action
- Can’t look in the mirror without thinking bad things about yourself
- Focused on yourself
Thoughts, Feelings & Emotions (DISGUISED):
- “I’m not smart enough”
- “I’m not pretty enough”
- “What will people think of me”
- Worry about being rejected
- Afraid that people will find out about your feelings of low self-worth
Things You Say To Yourself Out Loud:
- I’m not good enough
- I’m not smart enough
- I’m so bad
- I can’t afford that
- No sense I set a goal when I know I won’t reach it!
- Over extend yourself because, you can’t say NO!
- Bullying, exerting power over someone
- Sleep a lot
- Give up half way through things
- Don’t do what you say you’re going to do
- Always saying “I can’t afford it”
- Critical to yourself and others
Intangible Effects Of Low Self-Worth:
- Not following your dreams
- Low self-esteem
- What you choose to believe about yourself
- Wear clothes that are too tight
- Wear clothes that are too large
- Wear clothes that are worn out
- Wear clothes that are not age appropriate
*Your clothes are an expression of how you feel about yourself on the inside.
- Spend more money than you have
- Rack up credit card debt
- Don’t buy nice things for yourself
- Don’t keep track of your money and spending
- Not able to differentiate between needs and wants
*Your relationship with money is not only a mindset, but it’s also a whole way of being.
Your self-worth drives everything you do!
How you feel about your worth as a human being is so powerful that If you allow it,
low self-worth will always win out in the end.
It’s so important to know of your worth and that you’re worth is great!
This is what I recommend:
1. Acknowledge your gifts, talents and skills that you have, that you’ve gained or acquired.
Know who you truly are!
2. Know that what you do matters in the lives of the people you touch.
3. Have a desire to want to know of your worth, even if you can’t see your worth,
you can come to feel of your worth.
Combat low self-worth with truth!
You can always have peace when you speak the truth to yourself. Maybe you weren’t
told how special you are and that you’re a gift from God, but that doesn’t mean that
it’s not true. I can tell you without a shadow of a doubt that it is true!
Be charitable to yourself, you’re always charitable to other people, so, don’t forget
about you and that you matter. Make this journey you’re on worth every moment as
you feel of your self-worth.
When you focus on your gifts that you’ve been given from God, then you will start to
feel your worth as you use those gifts to serve others and well as yourself. It might
feel like a slow and gradual process of getting to know and feel of your self-worth,
but, what a great feeling it will be.
You and I – together, let’s toss out this low self-worth and low grade fever, so that we
don’t give it any room to move around or grow!
The time to feel and know of your worth is now!
Let me help you create an amazing relationship with yourself.
Connect with me at firstname.lastname@example.org
When was the last time you ever listened to the things that you
said on a daily basis? I think you would be surprised to hear all
the things that you’ve said to yourself throughout the day, and,
I can bet that a lot of it is negative(self-talk).
Have you ever heard the term or expression – you reap what you
sow? Whatever you say usually tends to grow bigger and bigger
as time goes on.
Think of your mind as a place where you plant all your thoughts,
feelings and ideas about how you feel about yourself.
Your mind is like fertile soil, ready to grow whatever you put in it
(plant). And, your daily negative thoughts are like water to the
seeds you’ve planted in the fertile soil which allows it to keep
It becomes this crazy habit that keeps growing and growing –
which becomes so harmful to yourself.
We are not born with negative thoughts and when we learn to
talk, our first words as a baby is not something negative – it’s
usually dah-dah. (It’ sad that it’s not “mama!”)
We imitate what we hear from those people around us. If you’ve
had adults around you who said a lot of negative things and had
negative self-talk when you were growing up, then the chances
that you will do the same is great.
Have you ever said any of these things to yourself?
I’m so fat.
I’m too short.
My hips are too big.
I’m already married, so it doesn’t matter what I
No one is going to want to go out with me because
I’m not attractive.
I’m too tall.
I don’t like the way I look.
There’s so much more that I can add to that list, but I won’t.
You know what you say to yourself, and, I bet that you have heard
other women say those things to themselves too.
How are you supposed to feel good about yourself?
How are you going to feel good in the clothes that
you wear if you are constantly saying those crazy things to
yourself? How are you supposed to feel like you can have a
good relationship with anyone else if you don’t have a good
relationship with yourself?
Trying to ignore all those negative self-talks that you have with
yourself is not going to help you in any way, it will only hurt you
more. It might have even become major dialog sessions that
you have with yourself on a daily basis.
Are you at the point of just not caring any more about taking care
I’m a big proponent for taking care of and appreciating your body
and I know it’s not always easy, but it’s definitely worth it.
(No matter what your dialog has been!)
How you take care
of and feel about your body is far more important than what you
wear. (I say that even when I feel that what you wear is extremely
important, it is second on my list of importance).
Negative self-talk is like poison to your body.
There is a book that I love that expresses this point, so much
better, the book is called ‘As A Man Thinketh’ by James Allen
and he says that “Disease and health, like circumstances, are
rooted in thought. Sickly thoughts will express themselves
through a sickly body.” (page 35)
Now, is the time to replace those negative self-talks that you
have with questions, really powerful questions. It may feel
strange at first, but if you have a desire to want something
better for yourself, then I urge you to make that effort.
You are worth it!
Write out on paper all the negative things that you recognize
that you’ve been saying to yourself. You may have buried it
deep down in the abyss of your heart and mind, but just keep
writing, it will surface the more you keep writing.
If I could, I would do this exercise for you, but, as you know
the only way to make it work is for you to write it all out and
work through it yourself.
Question those negative words you’ve been saying.
For example: If you have been saying to yourself ‘I’m ugly’,
then ask yourself if that’s really true and where did I(you) get
those thoughts from. When did I(you) start saying that to myself?
Are you comparing yourself to movie stars, music stars, women
on the cover of magazines? Did someone who didn’t like you
ever tell you that you were ugly? Especially little kids, they say
the meanest things. Did a kid say something mean to you when
you were a kid?
I have always believed in asking really great questions, all the
time. It’s amazing what you’ll discover about yourself and life
when you make it a habit.
You might even have to ask yourself the same question in many
different ways – so keep asking.
What you’ll come to see is that negative self-talk is draining,
how much time was wasted doing it and that it only brought
I bet that you’re really not ugly, and who defines beauty anyway!
You need to define what beauty is and means to you, don’t
allow someone else to define it for you.
Never ever compare yourself to anyone else, especially the
movie and music stars and the airbrushed models on the
cover of all the magazines out there in the world, because,
you are unique because God made you that way(and that’s a
If someone who didn’t like you told you that you were ugly,
then it’s really a sad thing for them. They are the ones with
the problem, not you. You probably were there to take the
brunt of their unhappiness, so keep that in mind if that does
ever happen to you.
Negative self-talk seems to come out somehow(without you
even realizing it) in conversations you have with other people.
So be aware of that. It usually makes other people uncomfortable.
Remember, you are worth it, so go for it! Don’t hold back!
You are worth more than those crazy negative self-talks that
have been taking over your mind on a daily basis.
Contact me today so that I can help you get started on working
through this crazy thing called ‘negative self-talk’.
Do you compare yourself to other people?
I don’t think it’s a new topic, but I want to talk about how it’s really not equal
– you, comparing yourself to other people, because we’re all created differently
and that’s the beauty of life is that we’re all different and I just want to let you
know there’s no two people – even twins, identical twins are not exactly alike.
So because we’re not alike, you can’t compare yourself to other people. I know
it’s a natural human tendency to compare yourself, and I know i’ve done it before,
but I try to I make it a practice of how I live my life now not to compare myself
and its’ great when you’re older, you get a lot wiser and you know better and
you realize that we’re all different and there’s nobody else like me.
I can’t be like somebody else that I admire. I can admire the qualities that they
have, but it would be really doing myself a disservice to compare myself to them
because we all come to earth with our own gifts and our own talents.
If you focus on what you have and the gifts that you’ve been given and you try
to make use of those gifts and talents in your life, then you really don’t have time
to compare yourself to other people, and at the end of the day it really doesn’t
make you feel happy anyway!
Usually when you compare yourself to other people, it’s what you see on the
outside, you’re not looking at the whole picture. You don’t know what their life
is like personally, you don’t know what kind of struggles they have going on
mentally and emotionally.
I would ask you to please look at your own gifts and your own talents and not
to compare yourself to other people.
As I continue to talk about clothing and style and fitting your clothes, what looks
good on you, I also give clothing care tips because it’s really important to care
about your clothes, not only to care about yourself but, you need to care about
your clothes, how to take care of it especially when you spend money on your
clothes – you want it to last as long as possible.
Even though I’m talking about all those other things, you need to make sure that
you just focus on yourself as far as focusing on what gifts you have – how can
you grow them, how can you make your gift become even better so that you
can share it with other people around you in your community, wherever you are,
wherever you go.
I know this because I’ve been working with a lot of women for many, many years
and I see the comparison that they do, even my conversations with them, they talk
about how they wish they “were like this person that they know” and this person
has ‘this’ quality or this person has a ‘perfect figure’.
We all have to embrace who we are, we have to embrace the gifts and just the
uniqueness that we are, I can’t even begin to express how important it is to
embrace your own gifts and uniqueness.
So, if you ever find yourself comparing yourself to other people, other women
-the first thing I would say is “just stop yourself”.
Just ask yourself some really, really great questions.
You can ask yourself questions like:
Is this serving me?
Is this making me feel good?
(I can bet you that the answer will be no!)
Anytime you compare yourself to other people, the answer will always be NO.
I can guarantee you that!
I have never met anyone that has felt good after they’ve compared themselves
to someone else.
So just start by asking yourself powerful questions and when you do find yourself
comparing yourself to someone else, make sure you stop it and catch it. Be aware
of it all the time because sometimes comparison can be a daily thing.
And then you realize after a while that it’s making you crazy, because we’re always
focused on someone else and we want to be like someone else when we’re not
realizing the uniqueness and the great qualities that WE have.
There’s always an underlying reason why we do that, sometimes we have self-worth
issues and we have self-esteem issues – even though we don’t want anyone to know
about them that we have them, we have them.
I have met a lot of people who didn’t want anyone to know, but it’s really obvious in the
way act and the conversations I have with them – the things that they say. Eventually
people will admit that they have these self-esteem issues and self-worth issues and
there’s so many people that have them, so if you find that you’re in that position right
now of having those feelings, don’t be embarrassed, don’t get down on yourself.
Just be willing to recognize it and to work on it – that’s the first step is to be willing to
recognize it. It’s easy to get into denial, denial can be something that’s really not good
for you and it’s always good to face the truth. Sometimes we don’t like the truth, but
when we face it and we work towards overcoming it or letting go of the thoughts and
feelings that really don’t help us and serve us – we start to feel so much better.
Then you find that you will stop comparing yourself to other people, it is a daily thing,
but it’s worth it, that’s the thing about working on yourself is that the harder things
are always worth it and I invite you to take an inventory of what you are experiencing
in your life, in your thoughts and your emotions. Are you comparing yourself to other
Sometimes it’s hard to admit it and look at it, but I think it you’re at a place where it’s
just making you crazy then now is a good time to look at, to overcome it. Of course
it will take steps to get there, but you really have to want to overcome these
Embrace your gifts and your uniqueness.
As I talk more and more about style and fashion, I have to include all these mental
and emotional thoughts and issues that we have before I can even really talk about
dressing so that you look good in your clothes and dressing so that your clothes fit
you properly, you have to work on the underlying things first before you can work
on the outer appearance, you have to work on the inner appearance, that may sound
strange but there is an inner appearance that happens on the inside that we try to
imagine ourselves to be, we can picture ourselves a certain way on the inside.
It’s OK, we all experience things in life. That just helps us learn and grow. We have
to have these struggles, so that we can become a better person, we can get to know
our strengths and our weaknesses and it just makes us ‘so much the wiser’ as work
and acknowledge these things.
Send me an email at email@example.com, I’m here to help you and answer
any questions that you have. Just remember, don’t compare yourself to other people
because it’s not serving you, embrace your uniqueness and the gifts that you have.
Have a good day, Aloha!
Please share this podcast with a friend or family member who
you think would get some value out of listening to the different
episodes. I really appreciate it, mahalo for doing that.
a huihou malama pono, which means – until next time, take care
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Make sure you visit www.fashionablefinance.com and leave me
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Mahalo for listening.
Aloha, Janin Johnston
Music by: Dennis Pavao
Song: Ipo Lei Manu
Album: Wale No
Produced by: Pilialoha Production
If you would like to order a copy of this CD you
can send an email request to Pilialoha Productions
Permission was given to use the music from this
Are you coming off of the holidays and end of the year celebrations feeling yucky?
(yucky is a real word, I looked it up in the Webster’s Dictionary)
Yucky seems to be the only word that really describes what it feels like after
Just when you thought you had enjoyed the holidays- something crept in to
make you feel yucky because maybe, you ate too much and you didn’t take
care of yourself during the holidays. Or, maybe you spent way more money
than you had, and you don’t want anyone to know about any of these things.
It happens to the best of us – you’re not alone.
It’s common that many women feel bad about their body after the holidays
especially when they felt like they ate way too much. There’s so much
temptation with all the amazing food that’s around. That can make anyone
I want to ask you some questions and take a minute to think about it:
Do you have bad or negative feelings about your body?
Do you find yourself not wanting to look in the mirror
because you don’t want to see how much weight you
Do you find yourself wearing baggy clothes because
you don’t want people to see how much weight you
Are you stressing out because you spent way too much
money and now you don’t know how you are going to
pay your bills this month?
The end of the holidays and the start of the new year is not supposed to feel like this.
How do you feel about it? Whatever your thoughts are about that, it’s O.K. that’s just
part of life.
If you let it, feeling yucky about those things can consume your life.
Feeling bad about your body didn’t just start during this past holiday season. Feeling
bad about your body always starts at an early age and I’ve talked a little bit about it
Wearing baggy or oversized clothes is not the solution.
Why would you want to torture yourself and feel bad about your body and how you
Here is what I want you to put into place because you’re worth it: Start treating your
body like it’s a gift. I know it sounds crazy, but just trust me and try it out.
God gave you and I an amazing body and we have to appreciate it and think of it as
Just think about all of the wonderful things your body can do – walk, run, give a hug
and so much more.
Turn that torture and bad feelings about your body and how you look upside down
and see what’s on the other side. It’s the same thing with your finances if you spent
more than you had.
Sometimes we all do things that are not the best for us. That’s part of being human
and living life. You have to experience things that are both good and bad, so that
you can learn and grow. Welcome to life!
Now is the best part… decide what you want. Do you want to continue to feel
bad about your body and your finances or do you want to work on letting it go?
A word of caution! . . . what ever you do, don’t compare yourself to anyone else
on this planet. Comparison will knock you down and keep you down. Remember
that you are unique, there is no one else like you on this earth.
You are special.
Making a decision on what you want is so powerful. No one can ever take that
away from you. Yes, it will take work for you to let go and overcome those bad
feelings, but it’s so worth it.
Anything of worth is going to take some work to make it better, and now is a
great time to get started and make that decision to overcome any bad feelings.
Especially since it’s the beginning of a new year and there seems to be a feeling
of hope at this time.
Remember, it’s not worth it to start off a new year feeling bad about your body
and your finances.
I am here to help you with your body image and getting your finances straight.
It is possible to feel good and get things in order.
Please contact me so that I can help you get started today.
Do you compare yourself to other people?
Comparing yourself to other people is not a new topic.
Comparison is not equal because we are all created differently, we are all unique
and have our own gifts. That’s the beauty of life.
There’s no two people that are alike, even identical twins are different.
It’s a natural human tendency to compare yourself to other people.
We all come to earth with our own unique gifts and talents, and if you focus on
what you have and the gifts that you’ve been given and try to make use of it –
then you don’t have time to compare yourself to other people.
You have to work on your inner appearance before you can work on your outer
appearance with style and fashion.
Embrace your uniqueness!
Aloha and Mahalo for watching