Tag Archives: Shame

episode #016 – 10 Questions You Need To Include In The Conversation You Have With Yourself Everyday

10 Questions

In this episode I share with you the10 questions
you need to include in the conversation you
have with yourself everyday.

The person we have a conversation with the
most every single day is ourselves.  You may
not have even realized it until now, but if you
just take a moment to think about all the things
that you think about every day of your life, you’ll
come to realize that most of it was talking to
yourself , also know as: conversations with
yourself.

It’s pretty amazing when you think about it, that we have these conversations
all day long and I wonder how in the world can we do that when we have so
many things going on.

These conversations actually do one of two things: they either help us or
hurt us.  And this is what I mean, it so easy for us to say negative things
to ourselves when we feel like we’re not smart enough or when we compare
ourselves to other people and much more.  By doing that and saying these
negative things to ourselves, it really has such a hurtful effect on your mind,
body and spirit.

Now when on an occasion or two we say good things to ourselves, then
it helps our happy hormones to feel good and leads us to feel happiness
and joy.  That also makes our mind, body and spirt happy too, and we
want to feel happiness and joy right?

I would love for you to start having great conversations with yourself as
soon as possible.  You’re definitely worth it and I hope that you know
know that you’re worth it.

I have a list of 10 questions that I put together for you to use everyday.
Start each day by reviewing all of these questions so that it can eventually
become cemented in your mind, which will lead to you automatically asking
yourself these questions on a daily basis.  It’s a pretty neat things to have
that happen.

Many years ago I started to ask my self these questions and many more
all the time.  It’s amazing what you start to realize when you do this everyday.

These are the questions:

1.  How can I make it important to consider and honor my own needs?

~You need to honor and take care of yourself first in order for you
to take care of other people.

2.  What is it going to take for me to start speaking the truth to myself,
     because truth is powerful?

~Have you ever heard the saying that truth hurts?  Well, it only hurts
when you are in denial about something.  Once you are ready to
face the truth, the truth will set you free.  I’m sure you’ve heard that
too.  It’s really not that scary like you might think.

3.  How am I going to know of my self-worth which is priceless?

~Knowing your worth is the key to everything which makes it
priceless.  Many of your struggles would disappear if you knew
your worth deep down in your heart.  The worth of your soul
is great in the sight of God.

4.  How can I let go of any fear that I have?

~Holding on to fear can be so devastating in so many ways. If you
haven’t already listened to episode #011 on Fear, then I invite you
to go and listen to it after.  Letting go of fear is so liberating.

5.  Do I have things that I doubt?  And if I do how do I let it go of that doubt?

~Doubt your doubt before you just accept it.  Episode #012 of this
podcast is about Doubt, so go and listen to that episode if you
haven’t had the opportunity yet and it will help you understand
a little bit more about this crazy thing called doubt.

6.  How do I let go of any shame that I feel?

~So many times shame just gets in the way of moving forward and
asking questions.  Again, in this podcast I created episode #013
that talks about Shame.  Please go and listen to it to get a better
understanding of shame.

7.  What value do I bring to my life and to those that are in my life?

~Have you ever thought about the value that you bring to yourself
and anyone else that you come in contact with, including your
family, friends, co-workers, etc?  Everyone has value that is
important to relationships, starting with the relationship with
yourself and then with everyone else.  The gifts, talents and
knowledge that you possess are of great value and need to
be held as such.  All of those things helps to create meaning
in your life and in the lives of those you care about.

8.  What is it going to take for me to feel joy everyday?

~Where here on earth to have joy as well as other things and
sometimes it’s hard to feel joy when life is moving so quickly.
So ask yourself if you’re feeling joy and if not, why not.

9.  Do I know that creativity is something that is already inside of me,
not outside of me?

~Everyone on this planet has the gift of creativity within them.  It is
not something that you acquire, it is a God given gift and it has a
purpose.  Everything you do is a creation.  Think about that everyday.

10. What do I need to do to be the creator of my success?

~It has to start with you and the decision that you make about creating
your success.  You have to want it and then take the steps needed in
order for success to happen.  Now, you don’t have to ask yourself
these questions in the order that I have them listed because it’s not
the order in which you ask these questions, but it’s the nature of the
questions themselves.
These are really powerful questions and to be asking yourself about
these things will have such a powerful effect on you and your life.
I can promise you that.

I have done it myself for years and I can tell you that it has had such a great
and powerful impact on me and how I live my life.  I know that I have become
a much better person in how I do things, the way I live my life and much more.
I’m not saying that I have it all figured out or I’m perfect because I don’t have
it all figured out and I know I’m far from perfect. I just feel better mentally,
emotionally and spiritually and I would love for you to feel all of that too.

Like I always say, write things down, get it out of your head and on to paper.
Writing things down has power.  It’s amazing what happens when you actually
read your own writing.  As much as possible I recommend writing thing down
on paper with a writing instrument of some kind instead of typing it out on your
phone or computer.

I invite you to try this out for 7 days and see how you feel after just a week of
asking yourself these powerful questions.  You will be glad you did.

Please send me an email at janin@fashionablefinance.com and let me know if
you’ve tried this exercise and how it worked for you.  I would really love to hear
from you.  I welcome any questions that you might have as well.

You can also go to www.fashionablefinance.com and leave me a voice
message through the tab on the right side of the screen.

You can connect with me at facebook.com/fashionablefinance.com and
www.twitter.com/janinjohnston

Please share this podcast with a friend or family member who you
think would get some value out of listening to the different episodes.
I really appreciate it, mahalo for doing that.

I hope you are enjoying listening to this podcast!

If you’re not already subscribed to this podcast then please subscribe in
iTunes, so that you’ll never miss an episode.

I would really appreciate it if you would give this podcast  a rating and review
in iTunes.

a huihou malama pono, which means – until next time, take care

Connect with me:  janin@fashionablefinance.com

Mahalo for listening.

Aloha, Janin Johnston

Music by: Dennis Pavao
Song: Ipo Lei Manu
Album: Wale No
Produced by: Pilialoha Production
If you would like to order a copy of this CD you
can send an email request to Pilialoha Productions
at: makai@maui.net

Dennis Pavao-Album Cover

 

 

 

 

Permission was given to use the music from this
artist.

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episode #013 – Shame

 Aloha, in this episode I talk about shame.
I referenced episode #011 on Fear and episode #012 on Doubt.
Fear, Doubt and Shame are the three main things that women
suffer from.

Shame is a painful emotion that we need to talk about, woman
want to just hide it under the rug, but I don’t want that for you.
We need to figure out how to get rid of these feelings that are
not serving us.

There’s no room in our life for fear, doubt and shame.

Growing up, have you ever had an adult say to you “shame on you”?  If you
did, said or behaved in a certain way?

We don’t think about how it’s going to affect our kids when we say those
things to them.

Everything that goes on in our lives shapes who we are and who we become
and the feelings we have.  We take things on.

We need to work on letting go:

First – acknowledge that you have shame within yourself.

Shame will look different for everyone – some people have shame about how
they look, shame of being in public, or speaking up, there are so many because
we are all so different.

You can quiet down those feelings and let it go by understanding how it affects
you in your daily life, being ashamed about so many things prevents you from
achieving the things that you want or prevents you from moving forward on things.

The only way to accomplish things is to get out of our comfort zone and do the
things that are scary and do the things that you feel are shameful even though they
may not be.

I will always tell you to write things down on paper, writing with a physical instrument
will make a big difference.  Write everything down that you can remember about the
shame that you’re feeling, when it started, why you think you have this kind of shame
even though it might be scary, but in the end you’ll be glad you did.

Get it out of your head so that you can work on letting it go.

This will help you move forward in the right direction.  Holding on to the shame that
you have inside of you is not helping you at all.

Denial is also a really big enemy.

We have to have the good and the bad in our life, there’s no way that everything can
always be good.  We have to have the bad so that we can appreciate the good –
opposition helps us to grow and overcome those things, that’s how God intended life
to be.

Don’t be hard on yourself and get yourself down, it is possible to overcome all of these
things.  It may take a little time because you’ve probably had these feelings for a really
long time.  It’s amazing how long someone can hold on to feelings of fear, doubt and
shame.

Change is really hard and can be scary, but the more you experience change – you
start to realize that “hey it’s not so bad after all”.

Letting go could mean the unknown, what’s on the other end. If we let go of something,
you’ll feel much better and feel different.

Letting go will feel much better than holding on to the shame and other feelings that
are negative that aren’t helping you.

Sometimes it’s better to get some help with understanding and figuring out these
things, so if you would like my help you can email me at
janin@fashionablefinance.com
we can see if there’s any way that we can work together.  I’m here to support and
guide you in a way that would be best for you.

If you know anyone who is suffering from shame, then have them listen to this
podcast and share with them what you’re learning, it’s always good to help other
people.

Women love to talk with other women and discuss the problems of their day, so
how about you talk with each other about this subject of SHAME.

It always feels good when you help somebody that you care about, so I encourage
you to share this podcast with the people that you know.

Shame affects our lives by making us feel like were not good enough, shame has
so many different faces.  If you don’t feel like you’re good enough to do very many
things, then you just go through life living the same-old, same-old not wanting to
stretch yourself or to make improvements or to work towards a dream or goal that
you have.

You are worth your dreams and it’s worth going towards your goals, we all have
dreams and goals.

We let life get in the way because we aren’t paying attention to those things that
are really important and shame seems to get in our way.

It pops up and gets in our face and makes you feel like you can’t do it or you’re
not worth it.

If you’re feeling uncomfortable, it’s OK, the feeling should pass, it won’t stay with
you forever.  Feel those feelings because if you try to ignore it that’s when shame
pops up in your face, and you’re not going to know what it is or how to deal with it.
It’s so important to know how to recognize it.

You’re worth it, you’re worth the time it takes to get out of the denial and face your
shame and admit that you have it so you can overcome it.

Good and bad words have power whether we realize it or not, everything you hear
and say affects you emotionally, mentally, spiritually.  So if you ever hear someone
that you know say “shame on you” please encourage them to not say that.

If you can learn to speak up and start to recognize these things and be vocal about
it will be so much more powerful in helping move you forward in overcoming this
shame.

Fear, doubt and shame holds you and keeps you down and makes you crazy
because you just don’t understand why it’s there or why doesn’t it just go away.

I welcome any comments or questions if you have any.

Would you like me to share a new Hawaiian word on each episode of this podcast.
The Hawaiian language is so beautiful and fascinating, that’s why I use the word
“Aloha” a lot because it more then one meaning.  It means: love, hello, goodbye, I
care.  And so much more.

A hui hou malama pono (take care, until we meet again)

I hope you are enjoying listening to this podcast!

Please share this podcast with anyone that you know of
who will benefit from the things that are in each episode.

Subscribe to this podcast in iTunes or Stitcher Radio,
so that you’ll never miss an episode.

Connect with me:  janin@fashionablefinance.com

Mahalo for listening.

Aloha, Janin Johnston

Music by: Dennis Pavao
Song: Ipo Lei Manu
Album: Wale No
Produced by: Pilialoha Production
If you would like to order a copy of this CD you
can send an email request to Pilialoha Productions
at: makai@maui.net

Dennis Pavao-Album Cover

 

 

 

 

Permission was given to use the music from this
artist.

 

Posted in Inspiration, Podcast | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

episode #012 – Doubt-It Doesn’t Have To Be!

Doubt - It Doesn't Have To Be!

Aloha, in this episode I talk about Doubt – It Doesn’t Have To Be!

I think a lot about all of you listeners every day and whatI can
share with you, and to share the things that I’ve learned and the
experiences that I had.

I want to talk about Doubt-It Doesn’t Have To Be!  I have met so
many people who suffer from doubt, we have so much that we
doubt in our daily lives.

I wanted to see the dictionary’s definition of ‘doubt’ and it says:to
be uncertain about, to consider questionable or unlikely, hesitate
to believe, to distrust, to fear, to be apprehensive about, to be
uncertain about something to be undecided in opinion or belief.

How many of you have a lot of doubt within you?

Fear and doubt have a strong connection.  Have you ever been
in a conversation with someone and they say to you “I doubt it”
without even doing the research and finding out if something is
true or not?

Have you ever questioned your doubt?  You should always doubt
the doubt before we just accept it.

Women suffer from Fear, Doubt and Shame.  What do you doubt in
your life?  Doubt comes from different places just like fear.  Doubt
really stops us from achieving a lot of things and has us feeling like
we can’t move forward.  It also prevents us from feeling joy and creating.

Writing everything down on paper about your doubt is a great way to
figure out what is it that you’ve been doubting all these years.  Write
down whatever’s going on in your life.  Write down if it’s a person that
your doubting, is it a place your at right now or is it a thing in your life
that you’re doubting.  Take the time to figure out what your doubts are.

We have to have trials and struggles in life, that’s how we can learn and
grow and to gain knowledge to be able to overcome our weaknesses,
that’s how God created life to be.

There is a doubt that you have that is preventing you from overcoming
a lot of things or achieving your goals.

Question the doubts.

Everyone I know has conversations in their mind, so why noT have a
conversation with yourself about figuring out what your doubts are and
how to overcome them.  Work it out in your mind.

We all have strengths and weaknesses.

If you need help with figuring out what you’re having doubts about, I
will be happy to help you, send me an email at janin@fashionablefinance.com.

Doubt is a big killer of joy and creativity.  Creativity is not limited to drawing
and painting, everything we do everyday is creative and were always creating.

I love people, I think people are really fascinating and we all need each other.
There’s so much we as women have to offer so many people, that’s why we
need to let go of the doubt.

I would love your feedback, send me your comments or questions.

Make sure you visit www.fashionablefinance.com and leave me a voice
message through the Speakpipe app.

You can also find me at facebook.com/fashionablefinance.com and
www.twitter.com/janinjohnston

I hope you are enjoying listening to this podcast!

Please share this podcast with anyone that you know of
who will benefit from the things that are in each episode.

Subscribe to this podcast in iTunes or Stitcher Radio,
so that you’ll never miss an episode.

I would really appreciate it if you would give this podcast –
The Fashionable Finance Podcast a rating and review in
iTunes.

Connect with me:  janin@fashionablefinance.com

Mahalo for listening.

Aloha, Janin Johnston

Music by: Dennis Pavao
Song: Morningside
Album: Wale No
Produced by: Pilialoha Production
If you would like to order a copy of this CD you
can send an email request to Pilialoha Productions
at: makai@maui.net

Dennis Pavao-Album Cover

 

 

 

 

Permission was given to use the music from this
artist.

Posted in Podcast | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment