Tag Archives: Body Image

Body Image, How It Affects You

One of the things that I’ve discovered by working with women is that
they suffer from really poor body image.  It’s really hard to look good
in your clothes if you have a really poor body image, because your
poor body image shows up in your posture, how you stand how you
walk, how you sit, how you talk.

Do you have a poor body image?

If you’ve answered you to that question, your not the only one.
Try thinking about the things that are positive instead of focusing
on the negative things about yourself.

Mahalo for watching!

Aloha, Janin

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Negative Self-Talk

Negative Self-Talk - 2

When was the last time you ever listened to the things that you
said on a daily basis?  I think you would be surprised to hear all
the things that you’ve said to yourself throughout the day, and,
I can bet that a lot of it is negative(self-talk).

Have you ever heard the term or expression – you reap what you
sow?  Whatever you say usually tends to grow bigger and bigger
as time goes on.

Think of your mind as a place where you plant all your thoughts,
feelings and ideas about how you feel about yourself.

Your mind is like fertile soil, ready to grow whatever you put in it
(plant).  And, your daily negative thoughts are like water to the
seeds you’ve planted in the fertile soil which allows it to keep
growing.

THEN-

It becomes this crazy habit that keeps growing and growing –
which becomes so harmful to yourself.

We are not born with negative thoughts and when we learn to
talk, our first words as a baby is not something negative – it’s
usually dah-dah.  (It’ sad that it’s not “mama!”)

We imitate what we hear from those people around us. If you’ve
had adults around you who said a lot of negative things and had
negative self-talk when you were growing up, then the chances
that you will do the same is great.

Have you ever said any of these things to yourself?

  • I’m so fat.

  • I’m too short.

  • My hips are too big.

  • I’m ugly.

  • I’m already married, so it doesn’t matter what I
    look like.

  • No one is going to want to go out with me because
    I’m not attractive.

  • I’m too tall.

  • I don’t like the way I look.

There’s so much more that I can add to that list, but I won’t.

You know what you say to yourself, and, I bet that you have heard
other women say those things to themselves too.

How are you supposed to feel good about yourself?

How are you going to feel good in the clothes that
you wear if you are constantly saying those crazy things to
yourself?  How are you supposed to feel like you can have a
good relationship with anyone else if you don’t have a good
relationship with yourself?

Trying to ignore all those negative self-talks that you have with
yourself is not going to help you in any way, it will only hurt you
more.  It might have even become major dialog sessions that
you have with yourself on a daily basis.

Are you at the point of just not caring any more about taking care
of yourself?

I’m a big proponent for taking care of and appreciating your body
and I know it’s not always easy, but it’s definitely worth it.
(No matter what your dialog has been!)

How you take care
of and feel about your body is far more important than what you
wear. (I say that even when I feel that what you wear is extremely
important, it is second on my list of importance).

Negative self-talk is like poison to your body.

There is a book that I love that expresses this point, so much
better, the book is called ‘As A Man Thinketh’ by James Allen
and he says that “Disease and health, like circumstances, are
rooted in thought.  Sickly thoughts will express themselves
through a sickly body.” (page 35)

Now, is the time to replace those negative self-talks that you
have with questions, really powerful questions.  It may feel
strange at first, but if you have a desire to want something
better for yourself, then I urge you to make that effort.

You are worth it!

Write out on paper all the negative things that you recognize
that you’ve been saying to yourself.  You may have buried it
deep down in the abyss of your heart and mind, but just keep
writing, it will surface the more you keep writing.

If I could, I would do this exercise for you, but, as you know
the only way to make it work is for you to write it all out and
work through it yourself.

Question those negative words you’ve been saying.

For example:  If you have been saying to yourself ‘I’m ugly’,
then ask yourself if that’s really true and where did I(you) get
those thoughts from.  When did I(you) start saying that to myself?

Are you comparing yourself to movie stars, music stars, women
on the cover of magazines?  Did someone who didn’t like you
ever tell you that you were ugly?  Especially little kids, they say
the meanest things.  Did a kid say something mean to you when
you were a kid?

I have always believed in asking really great questions, all the
time.  It’s amazing what you’ll discover about yourself and life
when you make it a habit.

You might even have to ask yourself the same question in many
different ways – so keep asking.

What you’ll come to see is that negative self-talk is draining,
how much time was wasted doing it and that it only brought
you down.

I bet that you’re really not ugly, and who defines beauty anyway!
You need to define what beauty is and means to you, don’t
allow someone else to define it for you.

AND!

Never ever compare yourself to anyone else, especially the
movie and music stars and the airbrushed models on the
cover of all the magazines out there in the world, because,
you are unique because God made you that way(and that’s a
great thing).

If someone who didn’t like you told you that you were ugly,
then it’s really a sad thing for them.  They are the ones with
the problem, not you.  You probably were there to take the
brunt of their unhappiness, so keep that in mind if that does
ever happen to you.

Negative self-talk seems to come out somehow(without you
even realizing it) in conversations you have with other people.
So be aware of that.  It usually makes other people uncomfortable.

Remember, you are worth it, so go for it!  Don’t hold back!

You are worth more than those crazy negative self-talks that
have been taking over your mind on a daily basis.

Contact me today so that I can help you get started on working
through this crazy thing called ‘negative self-talk’.

Aloha, Janin

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Feeling Bad About Your Body At The End Of The Holiday Celebrations?

Feeling Bad About Your Body At The End Of The HolidayCelebrations-

Are you coming off of the holidays and end of the year celebrations feeling yucky?
(yucky is a real word, I looked it up in the Webster’s Dictionary)

Yucky seems to be the only word that really describes what it feels like after
the Holidays.

Just when you thought you had enjoyed the holidays- something crept in to
make you feel yucky because maybe, you ate too much and you didn’t take
care of yourself during the holidays.  Or, maybe you spent way more money
than you had, and you don’t want anyone to know about any of these things.

It happens to the best of us – you’re not alone.

It’s common that many women feel bad about their body after the holidays
especially when they felt like they ate way too much.  There’s so much
temptation with all the amazing food that’s around.  That can make anyone
crazy.

I want to ask you some questions and take a minute to think about it:

  • Do you have bad or negative feelings about your body?

  • Do you find yourself not wanting to look in the mirror
    because you don’t want to see how much weight you
    have gained?

  • Do you find yourself wearing baggy clothes because
    you don’t want people to see how much weight you
    have gained?

  • Are you stressing out because you spent way too much
    money and now you don’t know how you are going to
    pay your bills this month?

The end of the holidays and the start of the new year is not supposed to feel like this.
Right?

How do you feel about it?  Whatever your thoughts are about that, it’s O.K. that’s just
part of life.

If you let it, feeling yucky about those things can consume your life.

Feeling bad about your body didn’t just start during this past holiday season.  Feeling
bad about your body always starts at an early age and I’ve talked a little bit about it
before.

Wearing baggy or oversized clothes is not the solution.

Why would you want to torture yourself and feel bad about your body and how you
look?   

Here is what I want you to put into place because you’re worth it:  Start treating your
body like it’s a gift.  I know it sounds crazy, but just trust me and try it out.

God gave you and I an amazing body and we have to appreciate it and think of it as
a gift.

Just think about all of the wonderful things your body can do – walk, run, give a hug
and so much more.

Turn that torture and bad feelings about your body and how you look upside down
and see what’s on the other side.  It’s the same thing with your finances if you spent
more than you had.

Sometimes we all do things that are not the best for us.  That’s part of being human
and living life.  You have to experience things that are both good and bad, so that
you can learn and grow.  Welcome to life!

Now is the best part… decide what you want.  Do you want to continue to feel
bad about your body and your finances or do you want to work on letting it go?

A word of caution! . . . what ever you do, don’t compare yourself to anyone else
on this planet.  Comparison will knock you down and keep you down.  Remember
that you are unique, there is no one else like you on this earth.

You are special.

Making a decision on what you want is so powerful.  No one can ever take that
away from you.  Yes, it will take work for you to let go and overcome those bad
feelings, but it’s so worth it.

Anything of worth is going to take some work to make it better, and now is a
great time to get started and make that decision to overcome any bad feelings.
Especially since it’s the beginning of a new year and there seems to be a feeling
of hope at this time.

Remember, it’s not worth it to start off a new year feeling bad about your body
and your finances.

I am here to help you with your body image and getting your finances straight.
It is possible to feel good and get things in order.

Please contact me so that I can help you get started today.

Aloha, Janin

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episode #023 – Every Woman Has Secret Feelings About Her Body

Every Women Has Secret Feelings About copyToday I want to talk about the topic that ‘every woman as
secret feelings about how she feels about her
body!’

I wanted to start off by letting you know that this is really
common.  Every woman has secret feelings about she
feels about her body.

Secret feelings don’t just show up one day in your mind
and heart, it’s like with anything that you struggle with,
it starts when you were a baby.

The one thing that I have always thought was really fasci-
nating is how little baby girls are so aware of what’s going
on around them.  If you’ve ever watched little babies, you’ll
understand what I’m talking about – it’s really fascinating.

They seem to be so much older than they really are!  I think
it’s just amazing how these little spirits that have come to
earth and they’re so much more valiant then ever before,
they’re just so much smarter.

And for that reason I want to focus on baby girls that
become toddlers, pre-teenagers, teenagers and then
women because, those are the stages in a woman’s
life that she becomes more and more aware of how her
body looks as she gets older. If you’re a woman, you
should have gone through all of those stages in your
life and are now you’re at a point where you have rec-
ognized that you have these secret feelings about your
body!

Secret feelings can be good or bad, and maybe you have
both good and bad feelings about certain parts of your
body because maybe, you might like your legs but not
really liking the rest of your body.  There’s no end to
what a woman can feel.

Baby girls are always paying attention to what’s going
on around them, all the time.  That’s just how girls are
created, we’re just aware of everything.  If you think
about it, that kind of awareness is something that con-
tinues on into adulthood.  I know it’s definitely a gift
from God given to baby girls, so that when they grow
up and become adults and have their own families they
will be able to know what’s happening and can nurture
their own children.

With that in mind, it’s safe to say that how girls feel about
their body is something that they learn from the women
around them.  It’s usually a woman and/or grandmother
that are/is the one taking care of and raising little girls.
A lot of grandparents are raising kids now days and it’s
been happening for decades.

Everything that a baby, toddler, pre-teen & teenage girl
hears about her body and other women’s bodies is taken
in and processed in a very unique way deep within her
mind and heart, because everyone is different.

We take all of these things in, and I’m speaking for myself
too.

From what I’ve seen and heard over the last 25 years
working with women and having women clients, is that
most of what they say about their bodies is usually negative.
There were some that had extremely negative feelings too.

Because I’ve sewn for women for such a long time, I thought
I’ve heard it all!  But, you know what happens when I have
to take my clients body measurements?  They start to reveal
their secret feelings about how they feel about their body,
because I’m wrapping a tape measure around them.

I guess you might say that they trust me enough to let me
take their body measurements, so they trust me enough to
tell me how they feel…about a lot of things besides their body.

They’ve said things like – they’ve heard women in their life
say things out loud like – I have a big butt, I’m so fat, I’m
too short, I’m ugly compared to _ _ _ _ _(you fill in the blank),
my boobs are not big enough, I have thunder thighs!  Wow!

That would scare anyone.  These are only a few of the things
that women think and secretly feel about themselves, I have
heard many more things from women but I won’t list them all
because it’s really sad.

I just love people so much that I don’t even want to say some
of the things that I’ve heard.

A lot of the secret feelings women have about their bodies
are a learned behavior and comparing themselves to other
women.  It’s just natural for a little girl growing up to copy
what the women in their life are feeling, what they’re saying
and what they’re doing – even if it’s harmful to their mind,
their heart, their body and their spirit.

It is possible to overcome this kind of negative feeling about
your body. (I just wanted to let you know)

It will take a little time if you’re willing and want to let go of
those negative feelings that have been dragging you down
for who knows how long.  It’s not worth holding on to negative
secret feelings that are probably not true.

I’ve heard a lot of things that I know are not true about what
these women are saying.

Women come in all shapes and sizes which is a wonderful
thing, because that makes us all unique.  You have to know
that your value as a woman is priceless.  I hope you ladies
think about this!

One of the most powerful things that you can do to get
started on having a more positive feeling about your body
is by learning how to dress for your body shape, and your
height.

I can’t stress enough how powerful it is to dress in a way
that makes you look good in the clothes that you have on!
I’ve seen it over and over again for many years how wearing
the right style of clothes that works to highlight the right parts
of your body (not that there’s a wrong part of your body), but
you want to put an emphasis on the right parts and not only
that, but wearing the right styles of clothing that fits you per-
fectly and it just happens to give you a boost of confidence
when you are wearing clothes that fits you right and you feel
good in it.

Now that, I say is powerful!  We all want confidence right!

Always remember – you want to wear clothes that work best
for YOUR body shape and height, and not wear the style of
clothes that the fashion models are wearing that you see on
commercials and in magazines and bill-boards, you see it
everywhere.

A these images that you see are photoshopped, none of it is
real.  Just remember these things.

When YOU look good, you FEEL good!  Looking good is
different for everyone.

I wanted to share that with you today, it is possible for
everyone to look good in the clothes that their wearing.

As I share more podcast episodes, as I mix in the fashion
and the style and the clothing fit in with your finances – I’m
going to show you how it all works together.

I thank you and I really want you to send me a message,
you can either email me at janin@fashionablefinance.com
or you can go to my website and send me a voicemail message.

I would love to hear what you would want to know about and
some of the things that you’re feeling or some of the things
that you’re learning or any ah-ha moments.  I would love that!
It really makes my day when I get messages from people.

I really hope that you really get a lot of value and maybe even
re-listen to this episode, because these secret feelings about
your body – maybe you want to think about it and see.  Are your
feelings negative or positive?

I would love for you to share this podcast with anybody who
you feel would benefit from listening to all of these things that
I’m teaching and sharing.

I hope you have a great day and I’ll see you soon, and I will
definitely be talking with you again.

a hui hou, malama pono – until next time, take care!

Please share this podcast with a friend or family member who
you think would get some value out of listening to the different
episodes.  I really appreciate it, mahalo for doing that.

a huihou malama pono, which means – until next time, take care

I would love your feedback, send me your comments or questions.

Make sure you visit www.fashionablefinance.com and leave me
a voice message through the Speakpipe app.

You can also find me at facebook.com/fashionablefinance.com
and www.twitter.com/janinjohnston

I hope you are enjoying listening to this podcast!

Please share this podcast with anyone that you know of
who will benefit from the things that are in each episode.

Subscribe to this podcast in iTunes or Stitcher Radio,
so that you’ll never miss an episode.

I would really appreciate it if you would give this podcast –
The Fashionable Finance Podcast a rating and review in
iTunes.

Connect with me:  janin@fashionablefinance.com

Mahalo for listening.

Aloha, Janin Johnston

Music by: Dennis Pavao
Song: Ipo Lei Manu
Album: Wale No
Produced by: Pilialoha Production
If you would like to order a copy of this CD you
can send an email request to Pilialoha Productions
at: makai@maui.net

Dennis Pavao-Album Cover

Permission was given to use the music from this
artist.

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